Still Missing You

I thought I was past this,
That I was done feeling this way.
But why is it you that I still miss
And think about some days.
It appears you have moved on,
And I thought I did too.
I'm trying to be strong
And figure out what to do.
But I can't stop thinking about it,
Can't help but remember all the fun we had.
A possibility inside my mind has been lit,
And this idea has been driving me mad.
Could there still be a chance for us?
Could we start it up again?
I don't want to leave what we had in the dust,
So what does this mean for us then?
Maybe I should just come right out
And say what has been on my thoughts.
What happened has made me doubt
What I originally thought were my wants.
I miss you.
I miss us.
With these thoughts, I'm not sure what to do.
And I don't know who else to trust.
I can't just go up to my friends and say this,
What would they think about my choices now?
But I can't help what I feel and miss.
I'm still trying to figure out how!
I mean, how can this happen?
How can this just come out of no where
And make my peaceful thoughts flatten.
I'm lost and to tell someone, I do not dare.
I can't help but wonder if you are happier now,
Or if you too miss what we once were.
To these feelings I cannot bow,
I mean…. what if they are only a lure?
Something to steer me off from where I am?
Still…what if they are as real as they feel…
And should I do all that I can
To maybe make them real?
This is all so confusing,
And I don't know what you would even say.
I feel as though I am losing
This battle with myself every single day.
I wish someone would understand,
I can't handle this mess alone.
I need a helping hand,
But I'm afraid of what might be shown.
I miss you a lot…
And I don't know what to think….
Every time I see you, my breathing stops
And my thoughts push me to the brink.
I'm ready to explode,
I can't contain it anymore.
So get ready to examine this load
because I don't want to be alone anymore.